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Seven Questions with Alena Chapman

Nancy Crowe

The Seven Questions series continues with author Alena Chapman, whose book, You Can’t Escape a Prison if You Don’t Know You’re In One: What is Blocking Your Freedom? was published in January. It quickly became an international bestseller on Amazon.com. I must disclose here that Alena is a client, and it has been my honor to work with her on bringing this book and her other resources to life.

11703585_626501670785560_1483092237041839402_oAlena is also a singer, music teacher, speaker, workshop leader, coach, mother . . . and survivor. Here’s just a snippet of what she has to say.

1. What we now know as You Can’t Escape a Prison if You Don’t Know You’re In One  started out as journaling about the transformational “tools” you’d acquired. At what point in the process did you realize you were writing a book?

Yes, I did start by sitting in a coffee shop writing in my journal. Mentors and experiences were happening so fast and I was learning so much, I really wanted to capture everything in a journal for my own memory. Soon I was giving examples of these tools being used by me and by other people. The journal entries grew into chapters with each chapter heading being the new tool I learned. One day, I took a look at all the journal entries and said to myself, “Wow, I wish I had a book like this when I started breaking out of my prison.” That is when it hit me — I was writing a book.

2. How have your sons adjusted to your more public persona since the publication of your book?

How they act with me is the same. However, when You Can’t Escape From a Prison If You Don’t Know You’re In One: What Is Blocking Your Freedom? became an international bestseller, I heard from other people how proud my boys were of me and they were telling everyone. The hardest adjustment is that I am working at home and very busy. My children are not used to me being home, but not really available. So we all have had an adjustment.

3. Describe the role of music in your life.

Music has played and continues to play an important role in my life. I started studying music at fifteen years of age. I sang classical/opera or operettas for a long time. In 1989, when traveling around the country to sing was not as feasible, I started teaching in area universities and colleges. I taught voice, gave opera workshops, vocal-coached musicals, taught music history, and directed choirs. This is when I found my love for directing.

For the past nine years, my love has been self-development and helping others grow in their awareness and their lives.

However, my house is filled with music of all types. If you see me driving by, I am the one dancing in the car.

Music raises our vibration, gives meaning, and just feels good.

51NTogNJ2dL._SX345_BO1,204,203,200_4. In your book, you describe being about to close on a new home for yourself and the boys, and being suddenly overwhelmed with old paradigms about not being able to do such a thing on your own — that you needed a man to take care of you. The book tells us how you got past it, but how does an independent, 21st-century woman get to that place to begin with?

Great question! Even though women have come so very far in our country, sometimes the men have not, especially the older generation. My dad was born in the early 1940s, so his ideas had not caught up with women’s liberation. Also, he always worried about me, my independence, and my creative spirit, which he did not understand.

Yes, I was very independent. I moved to another state, started my own life — but looking back, I see there were many times in my life I would hear his voice and it would alter my decisions for my life. Why? Because he was my dad, a major person in my life and I loved him dearly — along with trusting him.

However, I found that every decision I based on what another person believes or says always turns out wrong for me. I can now say from experience: I am the only one to know what is good for me. Any time I am not sure which path to choose, I may ask others their opinion, but it is my decision what I do with the information.

Really, I need to thank my dad. In a roundabout way he taught me to be even more independent, believing in myself, and strong.

5. What makes you stop whatever you’re doing and take a picture?

Beauty — awesome, ever-changing beauty. I love vistas — blue skies, sunsets, water with the sun dancing on its surface. Every day, we receive as a gift from the universe a new sky. Did you know there is never the same sky appearing to us? Each one is new and different. But if we do not notice, we miss that sky forever.

We wake to find clouds hovering below a mountain’s peak or an innocent fawn walking in our path. The old woman who shares her stories with the lines in her face and the sparkle of her eye and the two-year-old boy who holds a handful of dandelions as if they were made of gold. This is life in its splendor. A spectacular gift which, if I am lucky, I can capture with my camera to remind me of that moment.

My world always feels blessed when I open my eyes and see the beauty, the uniqueness, and the abundance of our universe.

This is what I stop whatever I am doing, become totally present, and take my picture.

6. What was on your gratitude list this morning (that you’d like to share, anyway)?

Gratitude lists start with, “I am so happy and grateful for…” Gratitude lists are a must-do to gain/keep your perspective, sharpen your focus, and raise your vibration. I always feel happier and ready to start my day.

The one constant on my list is my children. I can never be more thankful than I am for the joy and growth they give me.

This morning I also listed:

2. My ability to help so many people live lives that they love

3. My awesome friends

4. The wonderful partner in my life

5. I have a new day to achieve my desires

6. The beautiful fall day

7. All the blessings and opportunities entering my life

8. My own growth and discovery

9. The health of my family

10. Me

After I list what I am thankful for, I read through the list, feeling the thankfulness. This helps even more to internalize the gratefulness.

Next I become quiet, like a mini meditation, and I ask for guidance for the day. Then while still in this quiet state, I send love and peace to three people who are bothering me.

If you have never done a gratitude list or are trying to change your life for the better, it is best to write a list first thing in the morning and another before you go to bed. Soon you will find yourself being grateful throughout your day.

Gratitude is the attitude changer!

7. What are you working on now?

Right now I am very busy. I have a new program and course coming out in October. The program is recorded by me and includes a workbook, the CDs or mp3s, and my international bestselling book: You Can’t Escape From a Prison If You Don’t Know You’re In One: What is Blocking Your Freedom? The course is eight weeks, covers the areas in the program, and much more. Also, the course includes four half-hour private consultations with me, an empowering mastermind group with people from the course, and eight meditation CDs or mp3s. I am very excited to offer and teach these wonderful tools to people in such a great way.

Nov. 7, 2015 will be a highlight of the year. I will be having a one-day seminar at the Manchester University College of Pharmacy in Fort Wayne at 10627 Diebold Road next to Parkview Hospital. This is a great way to discover and see the opportunities and start on bettering your life or achieving your dreams. I will give you tools and plans to begin right away. If you seriously want a difference in your life — this is the event to attend. (Check www.alenachapman.com for more details and registration.)

And if all that is not enough, there is a new book just starting. It should be out in the summer of 2016.

•  •  •

Many thanks to Alena for being my guest today. Check out her podcast, “Conversations with Alena,” available on her website (above) and on iTunes. Happy Labor Day, everyone!

Elephants, moms, and memories

Nancy Crowe

UnknownAfter starting Jodi Picoult’s novel, “Leaving Time,” I wasn’t sure I wanted to finish it. A reference to an elephant named Mary being tried and hanged for murder in 1916 in Tennessee led me to look it up to see if this really happened. Sadly, it did, and it haunted me.

I was drawn in by the story, though, and couldn’t resist a tale that included a stumbling, self-doubting psychic. So I forged ahead.

Thirteen-year-old Jenna is a solitary soul who reminded me a little of Tatum O’Neal’s character in the movie, “Paper Moon.” Jenna’s mother, Alice, was an elephant researcher with a particular passion for studying how elephants grieve. Her brilliant, mentally ill father, Thomas, ran the New England elephant sanctuary where they lived and worked.

The novel hinges on what happened, or may have happened, on a night when Jenna was  three and Alice disappeared under mysterious circumstances. As a young teen, she’s busy working the missing-persons sites on the Internet and poring over her mother’s old journals, longing for the mother she both remembers and never knew. On the fringes of her life are her grandmother, with whom she lives, and her father, who now calls a psychiatric hospital home. Jenna finally hires jaded private investigator Virgil, who worked on her mother’s case when he was a police officer; and disgraced former celebrity psychic Serenity.

A precocious child, a boozy ex-cop, and a psychic with a past. Cue the cute music, right? The three form an uneasy, unlikely alliance as they try to piece together what happened that night, what led up to it, and who might know. Another sanctuary worker, Nevvie, died — accidentally trampled by an elephant, so the police report said — the night Alice disappeared. Was Alice responsible for Nevvie’s death, or did Alice herself die at the hands of her increasingly unstable husband?

The hardest question is the one Jenna has to face: If her mother is alive, why did she leave Jenna behind? As Virgil and Serenity draw closer to the answer, they increasingly want to protect her from it. Until Jenna takes the case back into her own hands and hops a bus for Tennessee.

And that’s just the humans. The elephants themselves, one named Maura in particular, have their own bonds and losses. Elephants are exemplary mothers; mother and baby elephants are part of a complex social structure. When Maura’s calf dies, Alice — both as a scientist studying elephant grief and as a steward and friend of the elephants — stays with her as they all process what has happened.

Grief is an experience of all creatures great and small. I had two peppered corydoras catfish in my aquarium, and when one died, the other stayed by his body for several hours.

Back to the book. The story resolved in a way I probably should have picked up on earlier — but I’m kind of glad I didn’t. You may find yourself, as I did, going back and reading earlier scenes.

Wings and water: A life in motion

Nancy Crowe 2 Comments

“Blue Heron Woman: Poems,” by Gail S. Burlakoff (2014)

This is not a review per se, as the author is a friend and former neighbor. Call it an observation.

“Blue Heron Woman” is the name given to Gail by a Cherokee-Cree medicine woman, the author bio explains, “and the name suits her; she has spent much of her life wadingBlue Heron Woman through one thing or another, watchfully waiting for the next adventure, moving from one place to another, defending her young, and surviving.”

The poems tell her story, from Hawaii just before and just after World War II to summers in the Ozarks; Panama; boarding school and college; as a “corporate wife” in St. Croix and Peru; and the end of that life and the beginning (and continuation) of another. It’s like a home movie with images that flicker by before taking off again, gradually forming a mosaic of a life.

It is not a fluid journey. There are stops and starts, joys and pains and choices. There is, Gail writes in a poem near the end of Part I, an itch to move on to something that will certainly be better — but the voices of the also well-traveled generations before her interrupt: “Halt. You are where you are for a reason. Stop, think, breathe, and be aware of who we are, Where we came from, Why we came. You are one of us, A courageous woman. Bless you.”

A blessing, indeed. I read the Kindle version of this book, but I recommend paper and ink for poetry. With an e-book I am never sure if the stanzas and line breaks are as the author intended, or if what I am looking at is simply where it all landed on the digital page. The photos, too (by Nikolai Burlakoff) would of course show up better in print.